- Tessa: I'm ready to die for Will. I'm ready to die for Jem. I want to protect the people I love, no matter what may happen to me.
- Fangirls: You're a stupid whore, please go fuck yourself or better die.
- Sebastian: I've killed Max, almost killed Isabelle, I tried to kill Jace, I tried to strangle Alec, I tried to rape Clary, I want to burn down the world. Oh, did I mention that I'm into incest and I'm a homophobic piece of shit?
- Fangirls: OMG SEBBY I LOVE YOU YOU PRECIOUS MISUNDERSTOOD SOUL.
Patron: “Hi, I need a motorcycle repair book.”
Me: “Oh yeah, sure. What breed is your motorcycle?”
Man [holding up a DVD set]: “I really hope you get more of The Wires in.”
Me: “We can request whichever season you need if we don’t have it on the shelf. Which one are you missing?”
Man: “Well, I’ve seen all five seasons, I just hope you get more.”
Me: “You mean you hope they make more episodes?”
Man: “Yes, that’s a great idea!”
If anyone ever tells you you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life.